Hey, guess what I found out? I am not capable of defending myself so therefore I need a man to do so. Yeah Bullshit, I know! On one hand I can understand a friends of loved ones concern with me having so many male friends and how friendly I am with EVERYONE. However, I would greatly appreciate it if once they found out about any of my new friends that I wasn't reduced to this helpless female incapable of taking care of and protecting herself. Granted women are attacked and raped on the regular, why should I live in fear of people around me, especially when I refuse to do so.
I told my boyfriend and one of our good friends about a couple new guy friends that I met and they both jumped on the defensive, "Oh where you meet him at?" and "I need to meet him so I can find out what his intentions are". So of course I am like 1) neither one of yall my damn daddy (yeah I resorted to that) 2) where is all this concern when I am out shopping at night by my-damn-self 3) why aren't you concerned about all the friends I make ( women are scandalous too) and 4) when was not able to judge people on my fuckin own?
I don't choose to look at all people I meet with distrust. I'm not afraid of letting people know me because that is who the hell I am, ME. I am not as naive as people believe me to be I just don't jump up and yell bullshit when someone says something suspect. We all know its bullshit so why point out the obvious ya know.
Whats kept me somewhat safe for so long is the fact that I follow my gut instinct and don't think twice about it, and the fact that I always have something that can be used as a weapon when need be. I have always held my own because I learned very long ago survival is something that you must do. I have survived alot, so trust me when I say reducing me to some in dire need, damsel in distress is far from something that I am not. I may not be the strongest but if I feel that I am any type of dangerous situation whomever is pitted against me gonna have one hell of a time.
1 comment:
You be trippin. You boyfriend and your friend just really care about you. And in caring about you they are worried and merely showing their concern for your general safety and well-being.
On da really real though, its more than that. Even though we as men are quite simple there are some very complex thought processes that go on (unbeknownst to us) to reach the *simple* conclusions we come up with. Men dont really want their women to be in, near, or around any temptation (even when none actually exists). ive broken it down to a perception issue. Having male friends for one leaves question marks and red flags all over. Most men like to believe that they are all their women need and with that said, whats the purpose to be around other dudes. Yes there are jealousy issues, self-esteem issues (fairly common), or just general relationship issues (i.e. trust, boundary setting, past relationships, etc). Several reasons may come into play as to why a person would exhibit those tendencies of questioning motives and intentions.
General rule is, most men are dogs. And men that are in relationships remember what it was like to not be in a relationship, hence their automatic distrust in men that befriend their women, or that their women befriend.
Its not 100% across the board, like most everything else there are some men that could care less. Whether it be their confidence, own shady business, or just have that much trust (shouldnt be asking to much, IMO)., some men are not caught up by the whole 'male-friend'/'helpless women' thing that others fall victim to. Its really nothing more than a different banana, cause theyll have their issues in some other department.
It does all come back to caring and trust. Its important to really care for the people you love, just as it is important to trust that person. Worrying may never go away but positive thoughts, open (uncensored) discussion, and a general display of respect for the other person goes along way to easing those ails.
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